


Connie is typing...

by Hydro_City_Zone



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Am i projecting? maybe, Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I can relate a bit too much, Overthinking, Post Episode: s06e10 Prickly Pair, Steven Has a Bad Time, Steven Universe is a fusion but also not, Texting, These episodes hit me hard on a personal level, Thought Spiral, oh well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-29
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:01:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22011484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hydro_City_Zone/pseuds/Hydro_City_Zone
Summary: He had to talk to someone.
Relationships: Connie Maheswaran & Steven Universe, Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe
Comments: 20
Kudos: 316





	Connie is typing...

~~ Hey Connie, are you u ~~

No. Delete it.

~~ Connie, I need someone to talk t ~~

Stop it. Stop it, you shouldn't bring anyone else down.

~~ I need help. ~~

You've already. Said. Enough.

After a few more minutes of writing and then deleting messages, Steven wondered if he should just throw his phone out a window. But he felt so trapped. So, so trapped in his own head. He had to talk to someone. Someone. ANYONE but himself. How long was it since he last saw Connie? Months? Had it been a year already? Had she forgotten about him? Had HE forgotten about her? Oh god. Oh god. Oh god, she was gonna leave him, just like everyone else. She was gonna leave and have a wonderful time in college, and have a normal human life without his weird half human life around to mess it all up. She'd find someone else. She's going to leave.

She's going to-

  
  


~~ please dont le ~~

**JUST. STOP. TRYING. TO TEXT HER. SHE DOESN'T WANT TO HEAR IT. JUST SHUT UP. SHUT UP! SHUT-**

His phone buzzed, pulling him out of his head.

  
  


_ Connie: You've been typing for a while. _

  
  


His bandaged fingers hovered over the keyboard. (Tons of little pricks from a cactus proved to be very bothersome.) (Not that he didn't deserve it.) (He deserved it.) (All of it.)

  
  


_ Connie: Is something on your mind? _

_ Steven: sorry. i didnt mean to bother you. _

_ Connie: No, it's fine. I'm just worried about you. _

Worried? Worried? Why is that the only thing he can do right anymore? Why did he just make everyone worried?! Why can't they just stop being worried about him???

He falls further down the spiral.

_ Steven: dont _

_ Connie: Why wouldn't I? _

_ Steven: not worth it. _

_ Connie: Steven, that's only making me more worried.  _

Good job, idiot.

_ She'll stop worrying. _

Yeah! When she leaves me behind because of how terrible I am.

_ Get over yourself.  _

What do you know?!

_ What do you know?! _

_ Steven: sorry. _

That was all he could manage to send.

She typed for a while, then stopped. Maybe she had given up on him. Good. He wouldn't be able to hold her back anymore. She wouldn’t have to deal with him anymore. No more. No. More.

Then his phone went off.

She was calling him.

I shouldn't pick up

_ If I don't, It'll make everything even worse. _

It'll make everything worse if I do!

_ Just do it, Steven. _

I can't do it, Steven! I just--

Before he knew it, he'd already pressed accept.

_ "Steven?" _

  
  


Don't talk.  _ Don't talk. _ Don't.  _ No, _ no,  _ no _ . He can't.  _ He already said enough _ . He can't.  _ No, no. _

_ "Are you... crying?" _

_...Busted. _

Shut up.

"Maybe a little bit..?" he mumbled. God he sounds pitiful. He is pitiful. 

She kept quiet for a minute. Then spoke again, carefully. 

_ "Did... something happen?" _

"No. Yes. I don't know. Thought spiral. Bad one."

_ "Oh..." _

There was a pause. A long one.

She hates me.

_ That's irrational. _

She.  **Hates** . Me.

_ Stop thinking like that. It's not how I'm supposed to think. _

_ "Is... there anything I can do to help?" _

He picked at the bandages on his hands. The pricks sting. The spiral tightens.

"...Be here?"

No one else wants to be here. Why would she? WHY WOULD SHE? 

_ Be sensible. She doesn't hate me. _

**I DON’T KNOW THAT!**

_ "Okay." _

"Okay?"

_ "Yeah" _

"...Why?"

_ "...What do you mean?" _ _  
  
_

"Like... Forcing yourself to be here with me. Why would you do that to yourself?"

There's a muffled sound, like she turned over. Was she in bed? Did he wake her up? No she texted first. But, why else would she be up? He started to feel like a thousand eyes were on him at once. But he was alone. They were his eyes.

"I mean, all I'll do is bring you down and keep you from your dreams. I just- I don't understand why you'd want to hang out with me and not just... I dunno, some normal human guy. You... You have no reason to stay with me. You don't  _ have  _ to stay with me."

She stayed quiet.

I said too much.

_ I really did. _

Why didn't I stop?

_ I couldn't _

I hate this.

I  **HATE** this.

_ Stop it.  _

You stop it!

_ "I want to." _

"What?"

_ "I don't  _ have  _ to stay with you. But I  _ want  _ to." _

His thoughts screech to a halt.

_ "I hate seeing you hurt." _

"I'm sorry."

_ "Don't be." _

"I'm not supposed to be sad."

_ "Steven, if you couldn't be sad, you wouldn't be human." _

It was his turn to be silent. The bandages are too much to bare. But he can't look at his hands. Not right now.

"I... I don't want you to leave."

_ "Then I'll stay." _

"I just... I-I don't want to be alone right now." He still sounds so pitiful. 

_ "Then I'll  _ stay _." _ She reiterated.

He held the phone tight, even if it hurt his hands.

"Okay."

  
  
  


"Okay..."

  
  



End file.
